Tuesday, September 18, 2007

The Great Escape?

Walt and Archie debate how Bertie might rescue them. (Wondering who Walt and Archie are? For brief bios, please refer to photos and captions in annoying "Meet the Dinosaurs" flashing thingy at right!)

Archie: “So, if you were Bertie, how would you rescue us?”
Walt: “I dunno, man. Some smart plan from a movie.”
Archie: “The only thing I’ve seen Bertie watch is One Million Years B.C. with Raquel Welch. Over and over. And over.”
Walt: “Naw, he watches other stuff, too.”
Archie: “Okay. What movie would help him get us out of here?”
Walt: “Well, there’s ‘The Great Escape.’”
Archie: “Great movie, lousy number of men saved.”
Walt: “Arrrrrr."
Archie: "Huh? What did you say?"
Walt: "Dunno. I suddenly felt like talking like a pirate. I don't know why. So, how 'bout Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid”?
Archie: “You could see that as a bad ending or a good ending. Either way, I see it as unhelpful to Bertie.”
Walt: “The Bank Job.”
Archie: “Oh, c’mon.”
Walt: “Escape from Alcatraz.”
Archie: “Bertie ain’t no Clint Eastwood. Plus, we don’t have any raincoats.”
Walt: “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest?”
Archie: “You do the math. ‘One flew over.’ How many of us are there? Let me help. There are 11 of us.”
Walt: “Okay. YOU come up with one, then.”
Archie: “Some kind of cool Ray Harryhausen movie where the skeleton dudes EXPLODE up out of death's icy embrace and SURGE to our rescue..."

"...And they're led by Bertie and Raquel Welch! In a fur bikini! I mean, Raquel Welch is in the fur bikini. I don't care what Bertie has on.” Walt: “Okay. Two things. ONE: I don't think Bertie was the only one watching Raquel over and over and over again."
Archie: "I like to watch that particular art film to see how wrong they get us dinosaurs. Don't they know we like to spend quiet nights at home reading? We're not all about running around with cavemen dangling out of our mouths. Ee-yew--they're all gristly and they never wash."
Walt: "Uh-huh, sure. Whatever. And TWO: Oh, sure. THAT’s gonna happen.”
Archie: “So, sue me. My dreams keep me alive. Okay. It's back in your court, Walt. What escape movie would help Bertie get us out of here?"