Depression? You Think You Got A Depression, Boy-O?

Look at you people, you’re slobs. Look at us! We’re penniless yet we are very, very sharply dressed. Where's your hat. Hell with the hat. Where’s your pep?

Your 401k is in the tank? What the crackymoke is a 401k? My best chum just jumped off this building. Naked. Beat that.

You can no longer afford to purchase your organic greens? I weep for you. Try eating dandelions every day for two years. With the dirt. Quit your downmouthing and get yourself a shot of Vitamin Gumption, Mr. Boo-Hoo.

Every day that I was jobless, I woke up and walked the railroad tracks and picked up coal. Huh? They’ve done away with railroads? Oh, sure. Well, they did that back then, too. All the time. We’d just save the tracks in our woodsheds and then sneak back after dark and put the tracks back. You got no get up and go.